Good lord have I been slacking. I’ve been in a funk. Does anybody else get high anxiety when the weather starts to change from cold and gray to sunny and 60? Usually I get funky going from warm to cold weather, so this is a new one.
This year has been really strange for me. I am used to occasional bouts of mild anxiety a couple times per week, where it comes on slowly and lasts about an hour or so. But the last two weeks I’ve had incidences lasting 2-4 days. Feelings of non-stop bodily and emotional anxiety. I have never experienced it more intensely than I did 2 Fridays ago; while working an 11 hour day. I put on a false happy face like no other. It began that Thursday night and didn’t go away completely until I woke up the following Monday morning after sleeping 13…yes…THIRTEEN hours on Sunday. I was horrendously exhausted. Decided at 6:30pm I was lying down and I didn’t get up until 7:30 on Monday. I did wake up feeling thoroughly refreshed, but then through the week again I began to get wonky.
We went on a couple hikes that weekend and it still didn’t pull me out.
This past weekend B literally did EVERY. THING. To get us ready and going on our camping trip. He packed, he grocery shopped, he got everything ready. I had zero energy and felt no excitement whatsoever, which is highly unusual for me when I get to escape for a couple days.
I think the worst has passed. This week I’m feeling more like myself, after a much needed weekend of trail time and camping out. I am so thankful for a patient and helpful husband. I was pretty atrocious to deal with the last few weeks.
We were expecting 68-72 degree weather all weekend but something changed in the middle of the night Friday when it decided to be 40 something with cold drizzly rain all day into Saturday. That didn’t stop us from going on what I would consider one of the most amazing hikes I’ve done in a long time. Simple. It rained, it was chilly, but I felt like it was cleansing me of all the weirdness and sadness I had lingering the last couple weeks. We got 12 miles of walking done between Saturday and Sunday and I sure have missed those long miles this winter.
Here’s some pictures of our camping trip at St. Francois State Park in Bonne Terre, MO. Some of the prettiest and sweetest hikes I’ve done.